This is messed up: I travel for 28 hours by plane to Singapore and it is hotter and more humid than Savannah. Then they tell me I have lost a whole day. They promise me I will get it back on the return trip. How do I know if this is true? I mean I do not deal in days. For all I know I may have forfeited the best day of my life. My daughter corrects me she says I do not gain my day back but instead I live the same day twice. Yes you heard it I will live the day of the 28 hour plane ride back twice. She thinks this makes me feel better.
What is this thing where they exchange money? I give them American dollars and they give me ‘money’ back. At least they say it is ‘money’ but how do I know this? I cannot spend it to see if it really works until I give them my American dollars. I was not born yesterday you know.
Later when I complained to a police officer he said, “I should not have exchanged money with just any joe blow on the street. You will never see that money again. You have to go to a booth that says money exchange on it.” To show him I was not a fool I quoted him the words of President George W. Bush “There's an old saying in Tennessee - I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee - that says, fool me once, shame on - shame on you. Fool me - you can't get fooled again." He appeared impressed; he did not say anything after that quote.
And I am not sure this is even a foreign country. I travel 28 hours by plane (did I mention this before?) to see a Starbucks, KFC, Firestone, McDonalds, Dunkin Donuts, Krispy Kreme and many other stores found throughout Savannah. They say the official language is English and it seems most people speak it here unless you need help; then the person you talk to breaks into Chinese. What is with that? They have three official languages here. At least now I know I am in a foreign country because in the United States we have one official language American.
So I traveled 28 hours by plane, I think I mentioned it before, and the tour guide tells me the ingenious Brits designed the city so that the Chinese, Muslims, and Indians would have their different sections across the river from the British. Funny, in the South we call that segregation not brilliant city planning, but what I do I know.
So the tour guide tells me with great pride that Singapore is a city, an island, and a country. A country and yet you can drive across it in two hours. I cannot even make it to Atlanta in that amount of time. I am so confused I cannot tell if this country is all confused or if (wait for it) the 28 hour plane ride here has left me all jet lagged. I will get back with you later on that.